I'm not a USA citizen and I love to read different cultures. I started reading about USA when first I started learning computer, I was in High School. Hollywood movies always attracted me, these movies are able to create a very shiny and modern image of USA. I was always in impression that this country is the ONE. Here people are literate , rules and regulations are on the place, currency is very strong and technology is making this country a new world. That is why this country is the leader. Women in this country are not bounded, they work with men shoulder to shoulder and I used to believe that these women must be happiest women in the world.
Well still that impression is with me, but when I started getting in touch with the Americans and started sharing thoughts, I found the image of this country in my mind is about to crash. The word "MODERN" which was making it different was about to wipe out.There are a lot of things that I observed and realized after landing here but the most sad part I observed was the life of a woman here. I was able to observe it so closely because I love my wife and she is the closest person in my life. After observing the women's life here it made me to think "who is modern and happy? USA woman or India woman? The reason I'm comparing with Indian woman because, number one I'm an Indian and second rest of the wold think Indian woman backward.
So in my observation I've seen USA girls (I'm not comparing anything with the kids), especially when they are teen agers they feel themselves are the happiest person in this world. In USA, parents can not put a hold on a child when they are teen, they can just argue, if they try to force their own child and she/he dials 911 ...than thats it...so these teen agers take advantage over them and live their life the way they want. Poor parents cant do anything. They don't study properly and get involve into all the adult activity soon. Their activities in result make these girls a Mom in their early age. I've seen many 15 years girls having babies. Sometime when I see them I laugh because at the age when they themselves are kid having a kid in other hand. Well in India there is a phrase -"if a kid burnt once by hot milk, he fears to touch cold milk", but it doesn't stop here. These girls get involved with another guy very soon and get another baby so by the age of 23 they carry 2-3 kids with them.
After having kids these women (new Women) start thinking about the true life partner, so when they find some one they tie a knot with them and started living happily. But it doesn't go happily for long time because the base of this relation was never a true love or devotion to the partner. The base of this relationship was sex so it destroys some where. It clearly happens by the age of 28-30, when a woman doesn't look as beautiful as she used to be in her teen age and her kids are growing and observing her. This is the age when they really get scared about the future but they can not show their fear, they can not take parents support and they started feeling them selves alone and get into depression. When these women reach at the age of 40 their kids are teen and they follow exactly same thing what their parents followed. These poor women can not do anything. By the age of 50 and so when their kids left them and started living alone these women find they have neither a loving husband nor kids to support her in that age, the age when an old person need rest and love these women work in grocery stores and other area, they drive car with the shaking hand and die one day in a home alone.
In other hand if I take a close look to the women in India I feel very happy about them, when they are kid they live in restrictions of their parents that some time makes them angry but it works out, they study and they enjoy the life with certain restrictions. As in India, parents are as respectable as god, rarely a child goes against them in their teen age. The result of these restrictions is the kid gets better education and focus themselves into career, so by the age of 23 these girls become Graduate/Post Graduate and they concentrate on the career. On the other hand their parents concentrate on finding a right man for their girl. Ok, this is a bit old, 40% India girls believe in Love marriage so they choose a partner (keep it in mind 1%-2% of these girls get into sex before marriage) and arrange a meeting with the parents and when parents are agree they get married with this man. By the age of 25-26 these girls become Mom and they follow the same standard what are set by their parents for them when they were kid. By the age of 40 they are more secured than a USA woman in this age. they are having a loving husband and loving kids with her. In India kids don't leave their parents like that, live together as much as possible. Because in Indian marriage sex comes after love, it brings a trust and loyalty between both the partners. Thats why India has low ratio of divorce. So by the age of 50-60 when they need some one, they found everybody around them. They don't need to work, they don't need to drive a car just have rest and care takers are there. When they die they are not alone in home.
I believe my observation will not hurt anybody, Its just my observation that I wanted to convey. I welcome all the opinions and view about my observation
Thursday, June 21, 2007
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